I should, by all accounts, have a secret celebrity crush on Jessica Biel or Brooklyn Decker – you know, a blonde or brunette knockout with a drool-worthy body and the kind of smoldering face that magnetizes you in some kind of lustful tractor beam. But guess what? I don’t. In fact, other than a slight infatuation with Olivia Wilde (but only in her Tron: Legacy get-up), my secret celebrity crush is Kristen Wiig. There. I said it and I don’t …