And that man would be me. Yes, I just gave myself a straight uppercut to Manland. Now, not only am I singing alto, but my childhood memories of The Smurfs are tainted by the kind of lifeless CGI, poop and fart humor and unintelligent swings at pop culture that made Alvin and The Chipmunks the first movie in history to almost singlehandedly usher in the second coming of Jesus. Considering it’s almost 2012, The Smurfs movie just might be the final nudge we …