There is tons o’ hate on the web for Justin Bieber and his balls-have-yet-to-drop voice, perfectly coifed hair and Chiclet-sized white-as-hell teeth. Personally, I have no issues with Bieber. Like a thousand other teenage artists, I’m guessing he’s a flash-in-the-pan and will probably nose-dive with the weight of fame. Probably after he acquires herpes from some loose groupie, starts doing heroin and wakes up at 21 looking like Josh Brolin. But that’s not the point. The point is Bieber’s new …
Category: News
I hate 3D. Dan hates 3D. Roger Ebert hates 3D. Francis Ford Coppola hates 3D, and now, in a show of solidarity, Francis Ford Coppola’s beard hates 3D. You hear that Hollywood?! Keep your damn 3D glasses! This ain’t the 1950s! Well, unless you count the culture of fear spread like putrid mayonnaise across the minds of Americans by the TV and radio political pundits and the government…but that’s another story! Long live Planet Beardatron!
Like George Lucas’ Star Wars prequels and Steven Spielberg’s The Lost World: Jurassic Park, Indiana Jones and The Kingdom of the Crystal Skull is a shared blight between the two legendary filmmakers and was a giant disappointment. Like the new offerings to the other franchises, I initially forced myself to like the movie, but on subsequent viewings realized I was in love with the nostalgia, not the actual movie. Shia LaBeouf, who played Indy’s son Mutt Williams in The Kingdom …
I love video games and would love to see a popular title make it to the big screen and receive rave reviews. Someday the translation from XBOX, PS3, Wii or PC to the silver screen will be good enough to cause Roger Ebert to recant his statement that “video games can never be art.” But I promise you right now this will not happen with the Kane & Lynch movie hitting theaters sometime in 2011. Bruce Willis and Jamie Foxx …
The only reason I ever tune into the MTV Movie Awards is to watch the hilarious film parodies throughout the broadcast. I’m talking Jimmy Fallon’s 2005 Tankman Begins spoof of Batman Begins, or Vince Vaughn and Ben Stiller’s sequel pitching to Lord of the Rings director Peter Jackson. Those are classic and I’d say most watchers probably flip the dial to MTV for the same reason. Let’s be frank, it’s not like the awards are legitimate or have any meaning. …
The Mayans and Roland Emmerich think the world is going to blow up in 2012 and they might be right, but I’m hoping it goes down the pooper sooner, because Mother Earth exploding might be the only way to halt Hollywood’s dog-in-heat leg humping of 3D. It was announced today the Men in Black franchise is return for a third outing, this time in 3D. It’s tentatively set for a May 25, 2012 release date. And, surprise, the film will …
Lindsay Lohan. Sigh. What a train wreck. She started off so promising in Freaky Friday and Mean Girls, but now she’s the epitome of tabloid gossip and fodder for ridicule and mockery in every avenue of the media. And while celebrities can’t necessarily stop the paparazzi from hounding them, they certainly can avoid any bad behavior that acts as blood in the water for the camera-toting sharks. Lohan’s drug and alcohol issues, arrests, car wrecks and all the issues with …
JibJab is celebrating the 30th anniversary of Star Wars: The Empire Strikes Back by letting you cut and paste your mug into one of their silly “starring you” shenanigans. I have a fondness for JibJab dating back to the 2004 presidential election and their popular “This Land” musical take on John Kerry and George W. Bush’s fight for the White House. At any rate, I slapped myself in as Lando, Dan as Han and brought some supporting cast in to …
In the event you haven’t heard, Chris Nolan must have Inception almost completely tied up: all of a sudden Batman 3 is scheduled for a July 2012 release date. As is, that’s a very quick turnaround schedule for a big film we haven’t heard much of anything about for the last two years. Batman Begins to Dark Knight had the benefits of a three year production schedule– Batman 3 gets two. While a lot of the casting is already in …
As much as I give the middle finger to the much-maligned Star Wars prequels, I won’t deny a soft spot in my heart for the universe George Lucas spawned in 1977. Despite Lucas’ best attempts, no amount of Jar Jar Binks silliness, wooden acting and Saturday Morning CGI could keep me from loving the original trilogy, specifically A New Hope and The Empire Strikes Back. This adoration for the galaxy far, far away is why I promise you I will …